Couples willing to be committed without marriage?

My boyfriend and I have been together for awhile and have discussed the views on this topic many times. We are both in agreement that we do not feel the need to be married to have a committed relationship. We both have friends that are married and very not happy in the current relationship and we do not want to be like them or become another statistic.





I have talked to others regarding our decision and most do not understand our views on not wanting to be married. I just wanted to know if anyone else knows of couples that are doing this and how well it is working for them. We are happy with our decision about our future...just wanted some views and opinions from other readers to see how they feel. Good or bad points welcomed.Couples willing to be committed without marriage?
I totally understand your views, Im 2 months pregnant and have been with my partner for over 4 years. We are totally commited to each other and the baby was planned. We both come from broken families that have been ripped apart by divorce. We have no intention to get married at this point, and I get really fed up with people frowning and judging us because of this. I think having love and partnership is FAR more important than a marriage certificate. Tradition is not always right, just because its tradition.. Don't let ANYBODY dictate to you how u should live your life, do what works for u! xx








amyvsn - But arn't u commiting a 'sin' by living with your partner????????Couples willing to be committed without marriage?
Of course he is agreeable to that ~ he's a guy. You are the one who is settling. You are allowing him to have all that you are for ';an understanding.'; You are the loser here. You're young but later in life, you will have no security, stability or accountability. Yes, I know, you dissagree, but you are selling yourself short. He may think he loves you but try talking to him about marriage and see how long he sticks around. You call that love?
I am currently going through a divorce. I am already in a new relationship. My boyfriend has never been married, and is head over heels in love with me. I love him also, but not as he feels about me, and he is aware of this and accepts it.





He asked me to marry him, and he even wants to get my name tattooed on his body, and wants his on my lower back. WELL I feel like, WHOAAAAAA fella!





Now getting out of my first and only marriage....I'm starting to analyze how I feel about the whole thing, and I don't think I ever want to be married again, and certainly don't want to mark my body with permanent ink to 'solidify' a relationship. I think that my agreement to love and be with him, and him only should be good enough.





I'm really over the whole marriage thing. It isn't all it's cracked up to be anyway. Once is enough. I agree with so many others I have encountered. If we have a mutual committment and agreement, then we don't need the laws of the land to solidify or validate it. Just like I don't need the validation or consent of a judge to tell me that my marriage is over. I said it is, and that is just THAT. I am making it legal and formal for financial reasons, and business purposes.





But no.......being in a relationship is great, but getting married isn't a MUST do. It just isn't that serious. It is more trouble than it is worth. The relationship is about the two people and their commitment, and that's it. Nothing more, nothing less. A ceremony and a peice of paper don't make it any more serious or any less fragile. Period.





Matter of fact......I'll tell my boyfriend that he can buy me a ring, if he wants me to wear a symbol of our relationship, and he can even call me his wife.....(but I don't know that I will be able to say the word husband for a long time to come.....) but anyway.......he can 'marry' me when ever he gets good and ready.....but the law and the church will have no say in it. It will be between me and him, just as it will be between me and him if we ever come to the fork in the road when it's time to part ways.





Marriage isn't what it used to be. Heck, I'm thirty years old. MAYBE it never WAS what they made it SEEM to be!
I am. Marriage doesn't make a relationship work. Communication %26amp; partner ship does.
If you are not ready to make a meanful committment to one another because you are not sure that you can make it work even if times get tough, then keep playing house.
I think you're playing it smart. Too many people rush into marriage. I know a couple who have been together for about 10 years without marriage and are doing great. They even have a kid in school. I imagine not being married will tend to keep people honest in their relationships too. I hear too many people hiding behind the fact that they are married. Marriage carries with it certain expected behaviors for many. Things some people may feel aren't necessary to talk about. I mean, marriage can be a pretty good excuse not to communicate honestly with each other. Hope this helps. Good luck!
TO me, it doesn't make any sense to be commited and not get married. Just because your friends are not happy in their marriage doesn't mean the same will happen to you. If you and your man are honest and true to each other, a marriage won't change that. Understand, some people get married that have no business doing so. It's entirely up to you both. But I think you two should take the step and get married. Now if money is an issue, arrange a wedding to your budget. A fancy wedding doesn't make a healthy marriage.





Good Luck!
Goldie Hawn %26amp; Kurt Russell been together over 10 years and are not married! I think marriage complicates things.
Depends what works for you. But if you don't marry, then have a living will, (say if he gets sick, you decide what happens rather than his parents), and other legal documentation setting forth the rights each of y'all have... as if you were married. Take care.
you can get married without paper work. people in the past used to get married without papers of forms.





just write down what the priest says during marriage cermoney, and get someone to say it to you and your partner, with some few witness, and your marriage is all set, no papers is required.
Your question shows lack of commitment. If you r not married then really you haven't made a commitment, just a low rent conversation n the heat of passion. grow up.
In my opinion, you should get married. I'm not saying it has to be right now, but it's good for moral values and before the eyes of God. (I don't know how relgious you are). Marriage is a bond and covenant between two people, it's when your souls become one. Some people look at it like it's just a piece of paper saying you can claim the other on your taxes and change you last name. Those are the miserable ones. I believe that you should get married, maybe not right now, but some day. Why should marriage change a committed relationship? If it's that good then marriage shouldn't change it, just make it stronger.
I don't think marriage complicates things. What is the difference between a life-long commitment to each other and a marriage license? The answer is a God-fearing person. Any worldy person has no problem with just living together with nothing heavier. You have that option of...well, if it doesn't work out, we could always get a divorce. No one wants to fully commit. When you commit to something, that means you stick with it - you don't later change your mind. In this world, no one views marriage as a serious, life-long commitment. There are always steps, goals, dreams, etc. that a couple continue to acheive. When you acheive one goal, you set new standards and goals for yourself.


I am currently living with my hunny, we aren't married...yet. We are engaged. I want to get married, I think it's only right. It may be ok to live together forever without being married if you are not religious, but for a christian it's a sin.
According to an AP News story in last night's paper...unmarried households now outnumber married households in the United States. So much for the conservative's efforts to protect the ';institution of marriage';, eh? If you don't want to get married and want to just live together go for it. If the commitment is there no saying of vows or a wedding will change that commitment to each other, one way or the other. Have a great life together!
I have something for you to think about . I have a cousin who was with a guy for almost 11 years they never bothered to marry. Well he died in a car accident. He never bothered to put the house in her and his name. so when his parents came into the picture they kicked her out of the house ,she never got a dime from his estate. So as a result she now lives with her parents because she is disabled and cannot work. Her whole life has been torn apart because of them never bothering to marry.Just food for thought .oh and also you dont get their social security if they die and you are not married. think about these points before you say no to marriage.
Basically Marriage (for non religious types I mean) is about rights. As his wife you have a right to decide where he gets treatment, if he is kept on life support, can't be thrown out the house, can't stay home while he works and then be left penniless because he now wants to leave.





Find out what rights you'll have as a married couple where you live and then find out how you can protect yourself as a non married couple for the same things. Basically, you only lose out on the tax break. Don't worry. If you know why, then everyone else will just have to accept it.
Ignore all these goody-goody married people trying to make you feel your relationship is somehow ';less'; because you and your man aren't married.....so MANY married people are cheating and doing whatever hell they want and with 60% married people ending up DIVORCED, and then everything gets split up, where is the argument about building some kind of marriage empire??? Give me a break. I know so many couples, married and not married....the marriage license doesn't make a committed relationship, two people working together as a team does.