I think right now in this country and abroad, marriage %26amp; having children is a scary proposition.
Today, the divorce rate is so high due to no-fault divorce. If you have kids, for women - that means they hold all the cards. A man today has to realize that, love and ';the dream'; aside, the risks to men/fathers far outweigh the rewards. Check the source - some great books on just this issue.
Family court is tilted heavily in favor of women/mothers. Moms have all the rights, get all the benefits, and dad is too often relegated to a visitor in his children's lives while being an ATM machine fro mom. He can lose half (or more) of the cash, cars, house, investments, etc... and worse - the children.
Seriously, if I had known then what I know now about how the divorce machine sucks in fathers, grinds them up, and spits them out so unceremoniously, I would have never gotten married and given up my dream of having a family.
With no-fault divorce (the biggest killer of marriage and families) you don't need an excuse anymore to get a divorce. You just don't have to feel like being married anymore - and with that reality comes the truth - a marriage is no longer a contract, so what's the point except to put yourself and your future at risk when someone ';doesn't feel like it anymore?'; With women (who have children) initiating almost 3/4 of divorces today (most men don't even see it coming), it's the smart man who chooses not to get married and certainly not have children... and that's a shame.Do you think divorce encourages couples not to work at their relationship as much? If it stopped being legal?
Yes, the fact that it is possible and permissible to marry for 14 mins and get divorced allows people to jump in with anyone in matrimony. Couples don't attend to work hard to make their relationships work. Their children in turn emulate their ways and carry on with such ways. People should plough hard to make their relationships grow. The rudiments of matrimony involve vowing to be together under every circumstance as such couples should try to keep to their vows.
Yes, the acceptability of divorce and no fault laws have pushed the rate above 50% and in some areas above 65%. With no fault laws one party takes all the rights of the other away.
Court ordered attendance of programs like Retrouvaille, and 2yr separation without dating someone else.
To do it faster there must be fault proven.
I think it should be harder to marry in the first place. You can marry someone in say Las Vegas almost instantly, but divorce takes months or years!
But I do think todays fast pased world where two parent have to work makes it difficult to spend the necessary time together. It seems no one has time to sit down together to eat a meal. Someone has to be at some extra activity or a parent works a night shift...
They should go back to Sunday being a day of rest and family time together like it use to be years ago..
Divorce has become to easy. No one wants to work at their problems anymore.
this is an interesting one !!.I think we have got so used to having what we want and what we think we need e g stuff on credit instead of saving for it infomation at the click of a button that folks cant be bothered to stick at something and work at it.May sound basic but i think its true.
I honestly think if people would just stop and spend some time by themselves-no friends/family opinions, and think about what they really want before taking that plunge, the divorce rate would be lower. I think that a lot of people don't really have peace about marrying somebody, they just go through with it because of all the pressure. Maybe they're at a certain age and afraid no one else will come along. Or maybe they're afraid of breaking the other person's heart to end a relationship after everyone thought they would be married.
Bottom line...it's okay to have some doubts before getting married, but if you don't have peace about it then don't do it!
In my experience- get rid of Alcohol and evrone will be happy!!! Sorry, but i am not going to live with a man who is verbally abusive to me every time he has a drink, and i will not take this abuse. You can only work at something for so lobg and if it is not working, it is not working. I try to keep things nice between me and my ex, but he doesn't want it. If the father is willing to spend quality time with his children it is easier, if he won't, what can a mother do?
I get annoyed when people split because they have 'fallen ot of love' i think these types should work at it, and think- if you hads it once, you can have it again....right? xxx
These Q's are good- keep em coming!
Ultimately, the people who will work at their relationship will work at their relationship, those who have tried and failed will choose divorce... that is the way of life.
There is no point in criminalising divorce as it was always intended as a final resort.
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